When we last left our heroes, Sugaya Risako had just made a deal with the devil, sucking the Berryz through a wormhole. The mass of Tsugunaga Momoko and Natsuyaki Miyabi was duplicated and went zooming down a separate tunnel (presumably to Buono!).

Strange things happen in this wormhole. Yurina sees a vision, in which she’s suddenly Momoko-sized, and being chased by a 6-foot peach.

But the Berryz’ journey has finally ended… Read more »

Posted: August 22nd, 2008 under attack of the con-fettis, berryz koubou, h!p kids, hello! project, pv, single, wtf.
Comments: 4

A few days (weeks?) ago, I downloaded scans of Maimi’s Winter Concert solo PB. If you haven’t already done so, you should. Lots of Maimithigh.

That said…

If this was a unit, I’d buy everything they put out, and then some. They’d be High-King, but with less squeaky fail.

Also? DAMN MAIMI.

(Real post coming soon. No, really.)

Posted: August 22nd, 2008 under eyecandy, h!p kids, high-king, maimi yajima, photobook, wtf.
Comments: none

alan is one of those artists that I had always meant to try, but never really got around to it. I don’t remember why. I’ll bet someone in H!P released a single that I completely bashed and bitched about but still racked up 100+ listens on iTunes with.

But one day, when I realized that I don’t really give a fuck about a song with the words “Monkey Dance” in them, I sat down and listened to “Ashita e no Sanka”…

…and then took out my earphones and stared at the screen in blank shock for about a minute afterwards.

Because this single is good. I’ve always been a sucker for classical or traditional music - cheesy, overproduced dance-pop is always fun, but going back to the roots is nice too. And that’s exactly what alan does in her first single. She employs everything from Chinese instruments to wailing in the chorus, and let me tell you, it all works in her favor. Read more »

Posted: July 23rd, 2008 under alan, avex, pv, single.
Comments: 4

…she’d totally sound like this.

I’m going to say something right now: I hate Cinderella. I really do. It’s my least favorite fairy tale ever, mostly because all Cinderella really does is bitch about having to pull her own weight around the house until a magical fairy godmother comes down to help her out and everything is fixed. And all Cinderella has to do is wash a few floors. (And she’s one of the 101 Most Influential People Who Never Lived. Above Luke Skywalker and Batman. This is an injustice.)

Read more »

Posted: July 17th, 2008 under berryz koubou, c-ute, h!p eggs, h!p kids, hello! project, high-king, morning musume, pv, reina tanaka, shuffles, single.
Comments: 3

And by that, I mean, nothing matches AT ALL, therefore making it one of the greatest costumes ever worn by any H!P member at any time in H!P history.

Don’t ever change, Linlin.

ETA: After further inspection, I’ve come to the conclusion that the top and the skirt aren’t so bad…it’s just that they top it off with that HAT. It’s not even the fact that it’s bold and blue, it’s that it’s a big-ass rain hat turned up so it looks like a pseudo-pirate hat.

I’m not sure whether they should fire the costumer or give them a raise just for making me laugh so hard.

Posted: June 20th, 2008 under eyecandy, hello! project, linlin, morning musume.
Comments: 6

I’m going to say this straight out: I like Resonant Blue. I really, really do. But it was just so…not what I wanted. Read more »

Posted: June 5th, 2008 under hello! project, koharu kusumi, morning musume, pv, reina tanaka, single.
Comments: 7

…but for me, that idol is not Gocchin.

Which isn’t to say that I don’t love her to pieces. I do.

Maybe a little too much.

Though she’s been gone, her catchy music and mic stand molestation will remain with us H!P fans forever. So here’s to you, Gocchin. You indulged a lot of dirty fantasies and brought out a lot of inner lesbians. I’ll never forget you.

Or your boobs, for that matter.

(P.S. Update your fucking blog. Don’t let your badass header image go to waste.)

Posted: May 10th, 2008 under 510, boobs, elder club, eyecandy, hello! project, maki goto, photobook, sotsugyou.
Comments: 2

No, I’m kidding. Kind of. Ayaka of Coconuts Musume semifame has graduated. It was announced about five minutes ago, probably hours after she actually left. Read more »

Posted: April 29th, 2008 under coconuts musume, conspiracy theories, elder club, hello! project, sotsugyou, wtf.
Comments: 3

Yeah. That’s right. OnGatas loses yet another member, this time to education. Seriously, what is with this group? They’re losing girls faster than Coconuts Musume.

Read more »

Posted: April 29th, 2008 under elder club, h!p eggs, hello! project, mika mutou, ongaku gatas, sotsugyou.
Comments: 2

Lately, a lot of people have been introducing H!P or Jpop in general to their friends, younger siblings, etc as a sort of scientific (cough) experiment on how well Jpop - particularly of the crack-induced H!P persuasion - would fare in the United States.

A similar experiment was conducted by me…well, actually, I don’t think you could call it an experiment, as I was just trying to introduce her to my cracktastic music. I wasn’t looking for any particular pattern or anything. I just wanted someone else to know what kind of music I listened to. Read more »

Posted: April 28th, 2008 under conspiracy theories, corrupting your friends, hello! project, japanese, morning musume, reina tanaka, v-u-den.
Comments: 3